I have been blessed with two children who were very attached to me and did not like to be left in the nursery.
I KNOW that it is hard to leave a screaming child in the arms of a nursery worker.
I KNOW that you walk out of the room hiding your eyes because you are crying.
I KNOW! I've done it MANY times. It doesn't get any easier for the parent. For the child, however, it does get easier.
I know this because I have four years of experience on the other side of that door as a nursery worker with one and two year old children.
I KNOW that it is hard to leave a screaming child in the arms of a nursery worker.
I KNOW that you walk out of the room hiding your eyes because you are crying.
I KNOW! I've done it MANY times. It doesn't get any easier for the parent. For the child, however, it does get easier.
I know this because I have four years of experience on the other side of that door as a nursery worker with one and two year old children.
There are two tips to a successful 'drop off' experience:
Tip 1 - Be Consistent
You need to have your child in the nursery on a consistent basis. Not only is it good for the child to understand that you leave and then come back, it is helpful for the nursery workers to know the likes/dislikes of your child.
There was one little boy I use to watch who would cry when his mom dropped him off. We found that we could put him in the high chair with a cracker for 10 minutes when he was first dropped off and then he would calm down, access the situation, enjoy his cracker and play happily with the other children for the next hour!
Trust me, the more you come the easier it gets for everyone.
Tip 2 - Be Calm
Kids get their cues from you. If you are anxious or upset, they will be too. So, put on a happy face!
When dropping your little one off, put on a smile and say: "Mommy is going to church. Miss teacher is going to take good care of you. You have your blanket and paci if you need them. I love you and I'll be back soon." Then give your child a kiss and turn around and leave!
The cardinal rule of dropping off a child is DO NOT STAY! The child will only be upset as long as you are there to witness it.
Most children cry for a couple of minutes and then calm down. But, I have honestly had children scream and cry while their parent is in the room and then stop crying the moment the parent leaves.
Your child is crying because he/she is trying to make you stay. Once your child realizes that you are leaving and you will come back, they will get on with life and start enjoying their surroundings.
FINAL THOUGHTS
-It is totally alright for you to ask someone to check on your child after you drop them off. There have been many times that I have sought out another mom or teacher and asked them to poke their head into my child's room to see how they are doing. Just make sure that you don't check on them directly. If they see you, they will start crying again!
-Make sure you pack something that your child loves (a blanket, paci, teddy, etc). Tell the care worker about it and make it accessible.
-Try to be one of the first parents back at the room once your event is over. Once kids start seeing parents they think about you and start getting upset. I always leave a couple of minutes before church ends so that I am the first back to receive my child. It makes their final memory happy and helps with the next trip!
There was one little boy I use to watch who would cry when his mom dropped him off. We found that we could put him in the high chair with a cracker for 10 minutes when he was first dropped off and then he would calm down, access the situation, enjoy his cracker and play happily with the other children for the next hour!
Trust me, the more you come the easier it gets for everyone.
Tip 2 - Be Calm
Kids get their cues from you. If you are anxious or upset, they will be too. So, put on a happy face!
When dropping your little one off, put on a smile and say: "Mommy is going to church. Miss teacher is going to take good care of you. You have your blanket and paci if you need them. I love you and I'll be back soon." Then give your child a kiss and turn around and leave!
The cardinal rule of dropping off a child is DO NOT STAY! The child will only be upset as long as you are there to witness it.
Most children cry for a couple of minutes and then calm down. But, I have honestly had children scream and cry while their parent is in the room and then stop crying the moment the parent leaves.
Your child is crying because he/she is trying to make you stay. Once your child realizes that you are leaving and you will come back, they will get on with life and start enjoying their surroundings.
FINAL THOUGHTS
-It is totally alright for you to ask someone to check on your child after you drop them off. There have been many times that I have sought out another mom or teacher and asked them to poke their head into my child's room to see how they are doing. Just make sure that you don't check on them directly. If they see you, they will start crying again!
-Make sure you pack something that your child loves (a blanket, paci, teddy, etc). Tell the care worker about it and make it accessible.
-Try to be one of the first parents back at the room once your event is over. Once kids start seeing parents they think about you and start getting upset. I always leave a couple of minutes before church ends so that I am the first back to receive my child. It makes their final memory happy and helps with the next trip!
I KNOW that it's hard to leave your child, but it gets easier. My son is now four. He would cry a lot when he was one... now he doesn't even turn around to say good bye! :(
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